Cuttin’ grass, my link to the past

I cut my grass, seriously; and the picture above is the exact replica of the rig I’m currently sporting in the ‘hood right now.

Hey you po’ ass, you think we are supposed to be impresssed?

Ok, there is somewhat of a convoluted story behind this post and since this is my house and it’s all about me, here it goes.

Where I stay

I actually live in a gated ‘hood with only 20 lots so it’s probably a pretty safe bet then that I’m the only one old-school enough to still cut their own grass. And of course, my neighbors are probably laughing at me not with me especially on the dog days of summer when it’s freakin’ 95 degrees Fahrenheit w/ nare a breeze in the air and my St Augustine grass should have been cut about every 4th day instead of 7.

Are you stoopid?

Well, let’s just say if a brainiac apocalypse broke out, I might be safe.

Good thing it’s a small yard then, huh?

Hmmm….my yard’s dimensions are 160X170 which equals 27,200 sq feet and if there are 43,560 sq feet in an acre, that means I am push mowing just about 1/2 an acre.

Didn’t you say your mower was self-propelled?

Yes I did, but I also mentioned I have St Augustine and this time of the year I have the mower on its highest setting and it will still choke it out if I just try to buzz through it.

I could have bought a riding mower, but if I’m going to do that I might as well pay for a yard service.

What’s the point then?

Good question.

When I was growing up my dad not only cut our grass every week, but he also went over to cut my grandmother’s grass as well. Do you want to take a wild guess how many times I offered to help? If your guess was less than two, you are probably pretty close.

This is my penance I suppose. I will tell you this, I’ll bet it rivals any cross fit workout that someone would pay $20-$30 to do. If you don’t believe me, I welcome you to come take the Dorman challenge and see what you think. Actually, I’m just trying to get someone else to cut my grass and disguise it as exercise so maybe they will pay me to do it too…:).

Bottom line? I like being outside, even if it’s August in Florida and I like to exercise (even if my fat pasty ass doesn’t look like it), so I can chalk it up as a win. Kind of like doing squats in the gym, hard as hell but still a great exercise nobody wants to do, so another one of those things you develop a love-hate relationship with.

Point two – my wife thinks golf is just too damn expensive. Therefore, if we are not paying a yard guy and she sees me busting my ass out in the yard, I’m hoping it garners some brownie points for at least a couple of rounds a month. Actually, giving her a foot rub while we watch a movie gets much more cred; and being one step ahead of the dog-house is always a good thing, right?

Point three – my dad taught me to be self-sufficient; I know how to fix things around the house. Yes, I could pay someone to do a lot of this stuff, but I like the challenge of doing as much of it myself as I can. And I know most of you think I’m Mr Excitement and just have absolutely no free time whatsoever on my hands; the reality is, I probably have too much and you know what they say about idle hands…..:).

So, do you want a medal, or the chest to pin it on?


Did you know summers can be damn hot in the F L A? If you try to cut the grass early, it’s still wet from the morning dew and that can make it difficult. If you wait until the end of the day when it might possibly be a few degrees cooler and you can actually catch a breeze, you are probably going to be dodging lightning and rain, and homey respects mother nature.

Ok, then what’s the moral of the story?

I work harder than you?

I’m not the sharpest tack in the box?

There’s really no moral to this story at all?

I used to play little league baseball and fondly recall the smell of fresh cut grass on a Saturday afternoon as we were getting ready to play. It’s not quite up there with bacon, but the smell of fresh cut grass is a good memory for me. It reminds me of play.

Both of my parents are gone, so maybe it’s my thread to the past; the one thing I want to hold onto as long as I’m physically able to.

Or maybe not; I swear to God I think cutting that damn grass will be the death of me, but you know what they say, right? If it don’t kill you it will only make you stronger (I know it was supposed to be doesn’t, but I’m trying to talk Cracker Floridian).

Love-hate; what are you gonna do?

Do you have a thread that holds you to the past?

Do you think grass will ever be legal in Florida?


17 thoughts on “Cuttin’ grass, my link to the past

  1. Hey, Bill – it’s interesting how when we get ‘old’, so many smells, songs, activities, etc. bring back such great memories… As I get older, the reality is our time on this planet is just a ‘blip’ on the screen.

    It’s a good thing you play golf and cut grass, or you would ‘blow’ that frame of your up! 😮

    Just don’t get any wild ideas about rollin’ that stuff up and smokin’ it, or it could be the end of you!


    • I would be at least 300 bills if I wasn’t active…:).

      The older we get, the better we were, right? It’s a good thing it’s usually the good memories we hold onto the most.

      Wacky tobacky I say.

  2. Hi Bill

    Okay, I shall not cheer you on about mowing your own grass. When I was a kid I had to rake wheel barrows full of grass and dump it. Did not really like doing that, so when I could I would mow the grass when it wasn’t so long, that way it didn’t have to be raked. I did this willingly on my own and I am girl! The yard took an hour and a half to mow, it was actually a lot of up and downs full of weeds and resembled grass when it was mowed. Does your half an acre have a house on it or is that all grass you are referring to?

    Oh, by the way I am the one that usually mows the grass now and have for many years and I am 66. Now with this broken wrist I won’t be mowing for awhile and since we don’t water our weed patch it isn’t growing much.

    I am all for doing what we can do without paying for it, great exercise and why not save a few bucks. But if I had lots of bucks I would spread the wealth around and hire someone to do the yard work and clean my house (I hate dusting).

    Your wife is a wise woman!


    • We do have a house and if you take that into equation, the ‘surface’ area of just grass is probably right at 1/2 acre. Of course, I have to make it sound a lot tougher than it is, but will tell you it has kicked my butt a time or two.

      Because I do sit so much I really need to find things that keep me moving. In fact, I might even have a post about that shortly.

      Good to see ya.

  3. Grass cutting isn’t bad 😉 We don’t hire anyone either (but the climate here in GA is way better. Must be really hot in FL).

    I cut the grass (I don’t cut the whole yard though, My dad does the hard part), I get some exercise and some vitamin D (It’s a win-win situation).

    Self sufficiency? That’s great. I have a lot of free time right now; trying to learn different things in life. Maybe I should add fixing up things (around the house) to my list 😀

    • Of course, some of my ‘home’ projects are ones that should take an hour or two and I can turn them into all day jobs….:).

      Some of it is fun just figuring out how to do it, and then actually accomplishing it.

      I like to cook too, but my wife doesn’t like me messing up the kitchen.

      Good to see you sir.

  4. Hi, Bill, my, your brain is in overdrive, or did the smell of the fresh cut grass do this to you? I start to wonder what kind of a grass this St. Augustine is ….
    A freshly draught beer on a hot summer evening will always remind me of my grandparents, they’d always give me a sip of their beer when I was a child (do not tell anyone)!

  5. Hey Bill,

    I use to have to cut our grass but I did get an allowance. Trust me, it wasn’t much because my Mom is SO cheap. Then I’d cut the neighbors yard too but you can bet it was for the money too. He paid me $5 more then my own Mom and I bet Texas heat is hotter then Florida.

    Even after I moved out I moved to my parents rent property where we had three houses and guess who got stuck mowing all of it. Oh wait though, I didn’t get paid for that at all. My Dad thought he’d just make my rent lower to make up for it. Trust me, it wasn’t that low.

    I then get married and once again, guess who cut the damn grass! Can you see where this is going? I got divorced and eventually moved into a condo where I don’t have to cut the damn grass anymore. I was so sick of cutting grass just like painting. Yep, always got stuck with that job too!

    I’ll probably never live in another house again Bill. I’d probably still cut my own grass though.


  6. Hello; I followed you over here from a post by adrienne smith, and I’m glad I did. She has been encouraging me to get out there and connect with more bloggers. As to your question for me its pop corn. I grew up in a family of carnival owners. During the summers us kids would travel with my grandfather’s show. Being kids we all wanted to have a little spending money, so we were always after the grown ups to give us little jobs. The first job i was ever allowed to do was to box up pop corn and put the butter on it. I wasn’t allowed to run the machine, but I smelled that sweet eroma for hours at a time. So, now days the smell of real pop corn at an amusement park,, a carnival midway, or a movie theatre brings back good memories. And I have a love hate relationship with my stationary bike. I call it the bike that goes nowhere, but i ride it and folow a healthy diet because I invested all this time and the insurance company’s money in having gastric surgery; so I’m doing my best. I ride it at least 30 minutes every day. Thanks for the great post and take care, Max

  7. As alwyas, Gattina, you’ve done a great job. Amazing how you alwyas manage to work the cats into the photos and still demonstrate the idioms. You skipped right over X and went to Y. What will you do next week when it’s Y & Z? LOL.

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