Didn’t you used to be somebody?

Why yes, yes I did until I became somebody else.

The older I get, the better I was

Athletic exploits, past romances, certain people; does time have a tendency to soften reality and give the impression that things seemed better than they really were?

I know someone who married his wife twice. Guess what? It didn’t work out the second time either. There must have been a reason they broke up in the first place, and apparently it didn’t get any better the second time around either.

It’s ok to fondly recall the past, but I truly believe we are better served to let the past be the past and start each day fresh, moving forward. People have a tendency to wallow in what was or labels that were attached to them even as far back as high school, and instead of growing, allowing this to limit their potential.

That’s letting others control your outcomes; playing to what others think.

I don’t know much, but I do know this

With age comes wisdom…sometimes; if it doesn’t kill you then it makes your stronger and wiser, right?

Do as I say, not as I do. Oh, I am still prone to do some pretty bone-headed things, especially when I hang with some of my male friends, but it’s never malicious; I should get points for that.

In my weekly (sometimes daily) redefining of my social strategy, I think I have come to the conclusion I like playing in social media way much more than I like working in it. Of course, that has probably defined me all of my life; I play much, much better than I work, I was just lucky enough to find a job that incorporates a lot of play into it.

I just wish you would grow up.

Yes, dear.

I tried, I really did but it was just not a good fit for me.

I’m afraid once you grow up, you grow old.

Don’t live life looking in the rear view mirror

It’s hard not to. There are certain moments you wish you could capture and just squeeze the living bejesus out of them and never let them go. Maybe if we can clear our minds and quit thinking about what’s next and fully live for the moment we can get close to maximum appreciation.

Do you ever go through a week and don’t recall one memorable moment; feel like you are sleepwalking through life?

Maybe it’s because I’m simple minded and easily amused, but I really look forward to each day because I know somewhere, somehow there will be some adventure or fun out there. Sometimes it occurs online and a lot of times it’s happening out in the real world. But if you look hard enough there is plenty of fodder to keep it humorous.

If you always think someone is out to get you and it’s never good enough, that’s just draining; no wonder you are worn out at the end of the day.

Want to know my secret of likability? I don’t bitch and moan much; if you are hanging with me I’m probably not going to have an ax to grind.

Maybe because I’m not not too controversial or a big fan of drama, I have a tendency to blend in instead of stand out. Kind of like watching grass grow or paint dry but at least I’m consistent. What you see is what you get…


Age is just a number

Yes, I know it’s only us old coots who say stuff like that, but I can tell you I don’t feel 87. I didn’t get the nickname Mr Happy for no reason and I’m certainly more apt to give you a smile. And it is very rare if you smile at someone, they won’t smile back.

My lesson for today? Attitude; it makes all the difference in the world and if you have the right attitude, you will always be somebody.

And guess what? Attitude is the one thing within your power to control; you might not be able to control much else around you, but how you react to these events are totally within your control.

Pretty prophetic, huh?

Why do you think it’s easier for some to have the right attitude and others never will? Can people really change?


40 thoughts on “Didn’t you used to be somebody?

  1. Bill, you always make me laugh out loud, thank you!

    I have seen very few people change. You either have a good attitude or a sucky one and I don’t have time for those people with sucky attitudes – I avoid them like the plague!

    I very rarely think about the past. I have space for what I’m doing today and where I desire to go. Theres so much room for improvement and growth, I don’t get bogged down with things that get in the way of progress.

    Folks who hang onto the past have a tendancy to hold grudges and a lot of unforgiveness in their hearts, too… They have a dark cloud hanging over them and if you let these types into your life, they will always drag you down.

    Answer to your first quesion: folks are driven by the nature thats inside them… Why do some people murder? Because murder is in their heart and it will eventually play out. Why do some people have a bad attitue? Because by the nature inside of them, that’s all they can be, it’s what drives their life.

    Answer to number two: Very few people ever change and it’s by a mircle that they actually “see” the need for change.

    Man, you’re getting deep on us, Bill 😮

    Happy Tuesday to you, sir!

    • At our core, I guess we are going to be what we were meant to be. Some can change, but it has to be something they really, really want to do.

      Not too deep I hope, trying to keep it humorous with a message.

  2. “With age comes wisdom”. I tell people; the one thing you can’t fast track is experience, and experience breeds wisdom…if we learn from it, that is. We are where we are a result of where we’ve been, but the past, although it has shaped us, should not define us. It’s what we do each and every day that defines us, and it’s our attitude that directions those choices, decisions and actions. Cheers! Snowshoes

    • We are a sum of all the parts and experiences; I had both good and bad going on when I was growing up and certainly used it to become who I am. Trust me, I could have turned out much, much worse so it’s just a matter of what you want and what you use as motivation I suppose.

  3. There’s a bagger at my local Safeway (grocery store) that always has a smile for everyone. I envy the sunshine he brings to the job. That he has Down syndrome does not diminish the gift that he is to us.

    Mentioning him is not a poke at you, sir. I just happen to think of him when I think of a perennial smile. And when I think of him, I smile in gratitude – gratitude for his presence. Not because I do not have his challenges. Nor in contempt.

    • And he’s smiling because he’s truly happy and sometimes all it takes is the simple approach to make it so. I don’t know why I’m Mr Happy, I just know it fits me like a glove. I try to spread that happiness without being over the top, but sometimes I just can’t help myself from smiling even when the situation doesn’t necessarily call for it.

  4. Bill – I did a long series of workshops a few years ago to have the ah-ha you share here! (Much faster to read your post) I was working on Social Media and it wasn’t all that much fun. I wanted it to be more like PLAY! Attitude changes everything.

  5. Just read a book that had some psychological research in it. One of the concepts it shared was life expectancy related to staying youthful, meaning being around people younger than you. People who had kids later in life, contrary to what you would think, lived longer. People who married someone much younger lived longer. People who married someone much older lived less.

    Point being, age is just a number, and who you surround yourself with matters.

    • LOL, Adam!! I’m laughing so hard! I’m picturing the couple – younger woman, older man.If your theory is correct, she might want to be worried, whereas he has it made! Can’t stop laughing. If this research gets out, people will be calculating like never before!
      But the kid thing…’tis true. I’m very blessed to have young children to get m up and moving when I’d much rather sleep!

      • Yeah, I don’t want my wife to read this because it looks like I’m the one who will be living long….and I did have a grandmother live to 102…:).

        I was ready to have about 6 kids, but after our first one arrived at 11.1 lbs…naturally….we almost didn’t have a second one. We stopped at two, but have plenty of nieces, nephews and cousins to go around.

    • Well, everything you described fits me, but my wife might not be to happy to find out she was on the back end of this line of reasoning…:).

      I’m having fun at this point in my life and that’s all I can ask for; sounds like a win for me….

  6. I laughed until my sides split, shared this all over the place, and came away with a deep sense of relief knowing I’m not the only one for whom growing up was not a good fit!

    Stay happy…and keep writing!

  7. Hi Bill

    I think we all can change a little bit, but rarely could you find someone with a 180 degree turnaround. (Okay Scrooge did…but that was just a story.) Maybe people that have had a near death experience might see the errors of their ways and want to complete change.

    I think most people just either mellow out with age or become bitter with age. It all depends on if you feel you are responsible for your circumstances or not. The longer one lives the more that they realize thinks are not as desperate as they once thought and the sky really didn’t fall in, as they were sure it would.

    Most times there is not much we can do about things that are actually out of our control we just have to wait until things transpire to our position to be able to interact.

    Yeah, I guess I am one those that was nobody. Fun post…it was supposed to be fun right?


    • My grandmother lived to be 102 (1898-2001). I can tell you she was never warm and fuzzy and lived a pretty hard life. However, she didn’t complain about much and in her later years she was quite pleasant to be around. I think it was the kids tearing up her house is what she didn’t like.

      There is so, so much out of our control; that is why attitude is so important in my humble opinion. I don’t want to go through life with a chip on my shoulder.

      Mary, Mary quite contrary; you are definitely somebody.

      Yes, this was supposed to be a fun post.

  8. You had me at “until I became somebody else.” Love it, Bill!

    I do think people can change but I think it takes a LOT for them to do so… I mean, they have to have some kind of earth-shattering revelation, like a near-death experience or something. The only reason to change is because the alternative is no longer good enough. And that takes a lot.

    • Every once in awhile I can pull one out of my b….er, uh hat. I missed out on Extremely Average, but Brian knows I am stalking him now. I am in sales, so I certainly know how to be persistent…:).

      It does take a lot to get people to make any kind of significant change and stick with it.

      Good to see you; sorry I’ll miss you at the Heckler’s Hangout tomorrow. We are having an employee appreciation day and the chiefs are doing the cooking.

  9. I have nothing good to add, so I’ll tell you what I did today, Bill. I waded into thigh-deep water to rescue a submerged canoe, returned a broken sledgehammer, and talked to two neighbors while my two little boys rode their bikes home, or somewhere, don’t know which. My youngest teenager (14-yrs-old) says, “Why are you always smiling?” I like to make people uncomfortable. But I won’t tell him that. I tell him I’m happy so that he’ll find something to smile about.
    This was a fun post. Thanks, Bill.

  10. Hey Bill! Finally stopping by since…um…seems like forever! I’m diggin’ the vibe of this post.

    One of my closest friends had such a horrible childhood. Her parents divorced when she was little. She lived with her mother, but she remarried and my friend was just “in the way.” The new step-dad didn’t really want kids and was very mean to her. So, her mom tried to send her to live with her dad, who was re-married with a “new family” of his own. My friend actually recalls the phone call when her mother called her father asking him to take her and hearing the two of them argue that neither wanted her. If that doesn’t screw you up for the rest of your life, I don’t know what will!

    You know the best part of this story? She didn’t let that define her and ruin her life. She is one of the most wonderful, caring and big-hearted peopled I know and I’m so lucky to call her my friend.

    I think of her each time someone complains about their life but doesn’t make any effort to change anything about it. Our past does not control us. I agree with Kaarina that it shapes us, but we make our future.

    • Hola; some people take that experience and say “if I ever have kids I will never put them through that.” My situation wasn’t that bad, but my parents divorced when I was a teen and my mother was an alcoholic. Needless to say, it wasn’t ideal and I never wanted to put my kids thru anything like that.

      You can take bad experiences to achieve positive outcomes.

  11. Hey, Bill, I completely agree with you, it’s not an age, it’s an attitude! I’m thinking if you hang around people with a positive attitude that will lift you up no matter what their age is.

    I definitely feel much younger than my age. My father is the same way. He exercises daily and definitely has a positive attitude, even though he has had a tough life. He has taught me always to find the good in situations. Always look on the bright side of life, right?

  12. You had me at “the older I get, the better I was.” Honestly, I wouldn’t go back to my younger years for anything. That’s not completely true — I’d go back to the day I met my husband and relive each moment with him ad infinitum.

    • That would be a good choice I suppose. I’m very comfortable where I am and what my ‘body of work’ has created. There are a few moments back in time it would be interesting to have a ‘do-over’ knowing what I know now, but nothing life changing.

      I’m half way through Saving Grace; she’s just put in her two week notice and getting the heck outta town. It will be interesting to see where you take her from here.

  13. I am a mere pup compared to some of you but I can say that life continues to get better. I think as I get older I have become better at just accepting some things and powering through the others.

    There is only so much complaining anyone can do. I am willing to listen to my friends bitch provided they are willing to take steps to change their situation.

    I hold myself to the same rule.

    • 10-4, I don’t mind if you bitch but please have a plan of action to do something about it.

      I know I’m in a good place now; I’m fortunate enough to have lasted a long time in a career that has been pretty rewarding so I’m not facing some of the struggles my ‘younger’ friends are going through trying to find their place in the sun.

      It makes it much easier for me to ‘play’ in social than actually having to find a way to make a living at it.

    • And each day is an opportunity. All our days are numbered so we should make sure we enjoy the journey, right?

      Thanks so much for stopping by; I really appreciate it.

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